7 Steps to Reach Goals As a Mom Even When There’s “No Time”
Because it’s not about finding more time. It’s about understanding the time you have and making YOU and YOUR goals a priority.
Before I was a parent, my time was my own. And now, my time belongs to the small gremlins who cause messes wherever they go.
But sometimes, I can find tiny pockets of time for myself.
And I’m desperate for those tiny pieces of time because I want to do something for me. Like, read a book. Or workout. Or start a business so I can feed my brain and support my family.
But just as I pull out the book I’ve been wanting to read since before I was pregnant, my 5-year-old slams a toy on my 3-year-old’s hand, and the screaming ensues.
And there goes that moment, slipping away as I get pulled back into parenting. And once again, I put myself last, giving up pieces of myself to others.
Maybe this is you too, so lost in parenthood you don’t even know what your hobbies are anymore.
So what are you to do to reach a goal?
Take small steps.
And make them as teeny, tiny as you need so long as you can count yourself making progress. Some of us have the time to walk, while others (like me!) have to crawl toward what we want.
It’s better than not moving forward at all.
Because all of those small steps add up to moving you closer to what you want.
There’s no secret to finding more time. What matters is being purposeful with the time that you have.
My life is time confetti. It’s just the phase of parenting I’m currently in. I have to get things done between snack time, school drop off & pick ups, and fights over stuffed animals.
But if I’m taking small purposeful steps every day (or as many days as I can manage in a week), then I’m moving closer to what I want to achieve.
One of my favorite quotes is by Karen Lamb. She said, “A year from now you may wish you had started today.”
And I keep this in mind when it feels like all of those baby steps aren’t adding up.
Let’s look at an example of what this can look like.
What if you can only find 1 HOUR a day to work on creating a business? Or writing a book? Or learning to draw?
That hour adds up to 7 hours a week.
And 7 hours a week adds up to 24 hours a month.
Which adds up to 288 hours a year.
Doesn’t seem like a lot… BUT it’s better than the other option – ZERO.
Because zero is where you were yesterday, and that didn’t make you happy.
It’s okay to put yourself first during that hour.
And this isn’t about being more productive or getting more things done. It's about doing something for you. Because it’s time your dreams and needs made it to your top 3 things to do.
Remember, on a plane, they tell you to put your oxygen mask on first before helping your kid. This is you finally giving yourself some oxygen.
Your goal action steps
First, reaching a goal – whether to run a mile or learn to paint – it’s not about the goal.
It’s about the habit. And the systems you’ll create to get yourself there.
Because once you’ve created these habits and systems, reaching a goal won’t seem as hard.
So the first part of reaching your goal will be a bit of planning (but not procrastination planning – actually making a plan). Then you’ll move on to taking action.
Decide what goal you want to reach in a year.
Why a year? Because a year seems far out enough that meeting a goal is doable.
If it feels like too much time for what you want to do, then change it! This is about you and what fits your needs.
And make your goal tangible and measurable.
Let’s say your goal is to start working. Okay, but what does “working out” even mean?
A more tangible goal would be “I want to work out 3 times a week for at least 30 minutes each time.” That’s definitely measurable.
But remember to keep it practical and manageable.
Saying, “I want to go to the gym every day and work out for 45 minutes” just sets you up for failure. It’s the reason you can’t find an open treadmill in January, but the gym is empty by February.
Track your time for a week.
You now know what you want to achieve, but how are you going to get there?
It’s all about understanding the time you actually have.
So you’ll want to track your time for a week. Like really track it – from scrolling social media to school pickup. You want to include everything you do.
You can do this with a pencil and paper. Or put a time tracker on your phone (I like toggl). Or use a physical timer (I like this kitchen timer and this visual timer).
But you need to understand how you’re using your time and where you can make changes.
For me, it was social media. This sucked up more time than I was happy with. And kept me from feeling I like had any time for myself.
I’ve been desperate to start working out again since I’ve been feeling tired and yucky. But I “never had any time.” Turns out the hour I needed to work out and shower was lost to social media. If I hadn’t tracked my time, I would have probably blamed my lack of time on my kids (sorry, kids!).
So as you look at your time over the week, remind yourself of this: If it’s a priority, you’ll make time. If not, you’ll make excuses.
If you’re looking for reasons not to go to the gym or take up salsa dancing, maybe it’s not about time as it is about the goal you set. And maybe you need to go back and decide on something you really want to do.
Create a goal plan or roadmap.
I like to take my yearly goal and turn it into quarterly, monthly, and then weekly goals.
A quarterly focus allows me to plan what I need to do each month, which then allows me to plan my week and my days.
But I only plan for the first quarter because sometimes I get to where I want to be quicker. Or more often, it took me longer than I thought it would.
Do I always make the right decisions on what to do or focus on? No, but every step is a positive action that I learn from and adjust as my plan as needed.
And that’s why I don’t play further out than a quarter. Because there have been times I’ve realized that I’ve been focusing on the wrong goal (this has happened A LOT as I’ve learned to build my business).
Seem like a lot of work? At first.
But once you have a system in place, it won’t be. Think of this as part of your habit-building. And by building in the time to create a map, you help create a system that makes it easier for you to move forward.
Break down your goal into small, manageable pieces.
First, start small.
When you look at your big goal, it’s tempting to jump right into trying to reach it all as quickly as possible. But this is where most people fail.
You have to build up to your goal.
If you’re starting from scratch, it’ll take a little time to build the habit of what you want to achieve.
For instance, you want to start painting again. Instead of saying “I’ll paint daily for 25 minutes” make it your goal to paint for 10 minutes for 3 days a week.
Seems more manageable, right?
Next, build up to bigger steps.
And as you build that creative muscle back up, you can add in more time or more days.
So instead of 10 minutes 3 days a week, you now increase that to 20 minutes 3 days a week. Or 10 minutes 5 days a week.
And this is where you’ll find yourself adjusting your plan.
Maybe what you thought would work doesn’t – like trying to take an invigorating morning walk with a toddler who likes to stop and look at all the bugs. So now you need to figure out a different way to get in a workout.
Or you find that you’ve been so excited doing something for yourself again, you’ve blown through your quarterly goals. Nice!
Set yourself up for success.
Take steps to remove the hurdles that keep you from doing what you want.
If you’re planning to get up an hour early to work on your business website, what can you do the night before to be successful? Me, I have my coffee set up and ready to go with a button push.
Want to work out that day? Lay out your workout clothes and any equipment you may need so it’s easy to grab and get started.
Want to read more? Always have a book near you all the time. So when you feel the urge to scroll on your phone, you read instead. (And maybe remove that one app that seems to always suck you in. I took all my social apps off my home screen and my reading time has skyrocketed.)
Give yourself grace.
One thing I tell myself is that if it’s worth doing, then it's okay to do it half-assed.
Sometimes I only brush my teeth for 30 seconds because I’m tired and want to get to bed. Would my dentist be horrified? Yes. But it’s better than not doing it all.
So if you aren’t feeling it, half-ass it. If you’re still not feeling it, give yourself the grace to take the day off and try again tomorrow.
We all need moments to recharge. Take that moment. Just remember to show up again tomorrow.
Celebrate your wins.
Because every step you take toward what you want to achieve is worth celebrating.
Maybe you’re up to walking for 10 minutes on the treadmill and are ready to push to 15. Let’s celebrate!
Or you’ve cooked at home 3 nights a week for the past month and reduced your going out spending. Celebrate!
Even if it seems “small,” remind yourself of where you were a week ago or a month ago. And all that you’ve achieved to arrive at this moment.
It’s all about progress, not perfection.
So whether you’re running, walking, or crawling along – KEEP GOING.
All of those small steps add up to help you build the life you want for yourself and your family.
Let me know how this plan works for you. If you think I missed something or it’s absolutely brilliant, don’t be shy, leave a comment!
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